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Archive for November, 2003

Stick It in My Hard Drive, Baby

Wednesday, November 26th, 2003

Are computer terms offensive?

This goes way beyond being politically correct. This is sheer and utter stupidity! I suppose that next someone is going to try and get changed that plugs are labeled "male" and "female". Oh, the horror! The human race has become a collective mass of hypersensitive imbeciles with egos more fragile than eggshells! "That hurt my feelings!" should not be a legitimate enough excuse to sue a person or entity! I see before long grade-school children getting their parents to sue another child on the playground for calling them names. Shit, it's probably already happened! I have a message for the world that it really should heed: GROW UP!!!

To calm my anger at the stupidity of the majority of the rest of my race, I must remind myself that there are cool people who live and breathe here as well. My Mom is one of those people. Yes, listen here, folks - I have one of the coolest Mom's around. She's my best friend, and that's no joke. But that isn't why she's cool. Yes, she reads this blog - she reads everything that I write, and she thinks it's all swell. But that isn't why she's cool. She brings a magnum of Asti with her everytime she comes to visit for us to share. But that isn't why she's cool. She's hip and open to try out the new music I introduce her to, stuff like Govinda even. But that's not even why she's cool. She's cool just because she's her - it's all of those things and more. I can call her when I'm sick, and she's the perfect Dr. Mom. I can call her every three minutes when I'm cooking meat for the first time, and she's a patient teacher. I can cry on her shoulder, and she really understands what I'm feeling. I can invite her to a wild party with all of my crazy friends, and she fits in as if she's one of the gang (my friends actually ask me to invite her!) Though she likes to try and organize your life, she listens to my thoughts on things and respects them. She thinks that I'm wise; how groovy is that? I can call her up and bitch her out for something stupid, and she'll turn right around and give it back to me just as harsh.

No, this isn't a big kiss-up to my Mom (who is reading this right now, I know, and crying). The reason for the post is simple. Doesn't my Mom sound like the coolest person ever? You know what, she is. She's strong and strong-willed, she's fun, loving and compassionate. She's young-at-heart and has a wild streak in her that never died. She's got more gusto and strength in her than she realizes and she's more remarkable than she'll ever give herself credit for. But my Mom - for all her beautiful traits - doesn't see it. All I ever hear is her knocking herself, and disliking herself. She can be pretty negative and critical - and she dishes out the worst of it on herself. I've been trying for 26 years to get her to see how amazing and beautiful she is - inside & out. Perhaps, seeing it all written out might open her eyes. So, Mom, (stop crying!), are you listening now? Learn to love yourself and everything about yourself because, you know what? You're pretty damn cool.

Thanks all for bearing with me through all of that - but I had to get that message out there. She needs to see it.

So it's back to trying-to-work. Do you know how hard it is to work the day before a major holiday? There's a buzz in the office - you know you have a holiday tomorrow. There's a big dinner planned for the entire office, and you know they sometimes let you go home early sometime after it. That right there causes enough nervous excitement in the air to change it from an ordinary work day to a Day-Before-A-Holiday!

And, on an ending note (then, really, I'm going!), is anyone else disgusted with how they push Christmas on us sooner every year? On Monday, two radio stations here in Baton Rouge started playing "continuous Christmas music - all day long!" Huh??! It's not even Thanksgiving yet! This year I saw the Christmas stuff going up in stores before Halloween was over. In a few more years, we'll just be inundated with the Christmas season all year 'round!

Hope everyone has a safe & wonderful Thanksgiving holiday!!

Friends, the Family You Choose

Tuesday, November 25th, 2003

It's good to have goals in life. I've just made up a new one for myself. It is my goal to own the entire Future Sounds of Jazz and Om Lounge CD collections. I got the original "Future Sounds of Jazz" back in 1999 and it's still one of my favorite CDs.

I've been noticing an alarming trend on TV lately. There is an abundance of commercials aimed at teaching parents how to be...well, parents. Let me repeat that - they have commercials teaching parents how to be parents. It's utterly obvious that parenting skills in this day and age aren't what they used to be (damn that no-spanking bullshit that started it all!), but you know it's gotten out of hand when the gov'mt feels the need to make public messages on TV offering up good parenting skills. That's just bad.

This life has taught me many things, but one of the more important lessons was that you don't have to be blood to be family. Mrs. Elsie and her brother, who we called Beep-Beep, lived across the street from my grandparents all of my life. They lived there when my mother and uncle were growing up as well. Mrs. Elsie and Beep-Beep were our family - they came over every holiday and we loved them like we would have any other family member. When they both went to live in separate nursing homes a few towns away, we still went to pick them up and brought them to spend the holidays with us. When Beep-Beep passed away a few years ago, it was my family who saw to all the arrangements and paid for his funeral. It was we that put "Beep-Beep" on his headstone, and we that lovingly bring flowers on the important holidays. Now Mrs. Elsie is very ill and in the hospital. We go to visit her, and she sometimes cries telling us how much she loves us. The nurses always ask, "Are you family?" Well yes, and no. We are in every way that counts, but my grandfather still had to lie to one nurse and say he was a cousin to get information on her condition.

The point of all this is that your friends and close loved ones are sometimes more your family than the one you were born into. I have always believed that these people are the "family you choose". Think about all of the people that are special in your life who are not blood related. This is the special family you have chosen - the people you have in your life because they make it a better place. Maybe you should give some of them a call.

With that, I'm outta here for the evening. Hope you have a nice one.

The World We Live In – Part 1

Friday, November 21st, 2003

Welcome to the first installment of "The World We Live In". After scouring Yahoo! News & Photos in the vestiges of boredom, I was compelled to post my findings here - to see if anyone else is as troubled by the goings on in this planet we call home as am I.

I'm sorry, but I'm having trouble feeling sorry for these people.

If someone calls you on the phone and says, "Hey, it's me - send money!", are you really just going to say, "Okay - where to?" There has to be more to this story than they're putting in this article, or the Japs in question are some seriously gullible and easy targets. I wonder if they know I have a bridge for sale...

When I grow up, I want to have more holes in my body than anyone on Earth. That's an admirable goal, don't you think? Being able to stick your finger through your tongue is just the icing on the cake. Of course, if that doesn't work out, I could always vomit live snakes.

And I really suggest you don't try the newest version of Russian Roulette. Can I get a duh! here?

And is it just me, or does anyone else think that Jacko has finally had to have his entire face redone in Play-doh?

This here shows that any jackass can call himself an artist and people will pay to see his work.

Thailand has a new twist on trying to help the spreading problem of teenage pregnancy. One wonders if this could have been accomplished, however, without the creepy sperm-baby floating inside.

And last but not least, is it just me or does the new Mr. Universe look like a giant slab of burnt bacon with teeth and blue eyes? That's probably the grossest thing on here - (besides 'ole Jacko, of course [that one is scarier than the first! -shudder-]).

That ends our first look at "The World We Live In". It's a scary place, isn't it?

Have a good weekend everyone!

Halloween Isn’t Evil, But Spam Is

Wednesday, November 19th, 2003

Ooh! Ooh! Got a new junk email to share with you. The thing about this one that makes me want to kill laugh is just how hard they are trying to make you send this thing on:

Forward this to at least 11 people and see what happens on your screen you will laugh your head off!!!!!!!!!!! If you forward it to 11 people a video comes on your screen. This works. I don't know how...but it works. Somehow, from the return path generated, you'll receive something, and IT IS FUNNY!!! This is the coolest thing I have ever gotten. All you have to do is send it to 11 people and watch your screen, it is the funniest clip. I can't tell you what is but I was laughing so hard I almost fell off my chair!!! So, send it to those 11 people and watch.
ENJOY!!!
Pass it around.

It works - really - pass it around - it's amazing. Please - fucking bite me. I know what it is on the clip... n-o-t-h-i-n-g.

In other aggravating news, a local rag posted a small, dim-witted editorial blurb that pissed me off. It read:

Time To Take A Stand
It's that time of year again when evil tries to rear its ugly head and duly influence our children by trying to take their souls. That's right, I'm talking about Halloween, the one night of the year we give free reign to the Devil. Even good Christians give free reign to this holiday and dress their children in ghoulish costumes. What is wrong with you people? Unless we take a stand against Halloween, the day will come when Lucifer himself will rule this country. That day is almost here - look at the evil all around you people.

It was posted on Nov. 10. So I wrote a response, because that kind of ignorant shit pisses me off. (Thanks Amb for bringing it to my attention):

You know, it's cool working for the same office as your man. I just heard his voice a few cubicles away. He's usually out in the field, but he has to stop in every now and again. Of course, he doesn't run over and talk to me - that would be pretty unprofessional. But I always smile when I hear him. He usually tries to work in his office time around lunch so we can have it together. I mean, really, isn't he the cutest guy you've ever seen? Allow me a few moments of gratuitous bragging, will ya? I've got me an adorably handsome, green-eyed, 5'4" Cajun whose main interests aren't football and big trucks; I'm a happy woman.

Added some new content to the left side over there - you can now see what mood I'm in. Lucky you, eh? This will change daily, or, knowing how moody I can be, numerous times in a day. Either that or I'll get bored with it and not change it for two months. But, anyway, it's there.

That's all for now. Have a Happy Hump Day!

Love Will Always Triumph

Tuesday, November 18th, 2003

One for freedom & love! Equality will win out in the end. You're fighting a losing battle, religious fundies.

Some kind soul brought three bags of fruit to work yesterday. I gorged myself on kumquats - quite possibly my favorite fruit. If you've never had one, you're missing out. It's sort of like an orange with a hint of lemon bite. Yum.

It was brought to my attention (thanks Paul), that I neglected to answer the questions I posed a few days ago: If the world were ending, what three people would you visit and what three things would you do?

Myself - I would visit my Mom, Brandon and Jeremy - who I'd stay with 'til the end. I would get piss-ass drunk, eat a pizza and then have mad sex 'til the big bang ended it all.

I felt like playing Unconscious Mutterings:

  1. Plan B:: What I always end up falling back on
  2. Seattle:: A place I think I'll never visit
  3. The lady wore:: Red velvet
  4. Upsetting:: The glass on the table...and milk goes everywhere
  5. Tampon:: Tampax
  6. Celebrity:: Is not what it used to be
  7. Baja:: Jeep
  8. 64:: Almost 69!
  9. RGB:: Really Green Bug (yes, I know what it really means - that's just the first thing that popped into my head)
  10. Milkshake:: McDonald's Chocolate

Is there something weird about wearing hats? I wear hats often - especially to work. I am the only person, ever, that wears hats to the office. I always get compliments and remarks about them. At least one day out of the week, I'm in a hat. It's usually more b/c my hair was a bit dirty and I was too lazy to wash it rather than a huge fashion statement. But the fact is, I've always worn hats. When I do, everyone seems so astonished - as if it's some brave and brash style I'm sporting. What's up with that? Do you wear hats? Do people act all amazed when you do?

Ah, let me get back to the grind. I'm rather busy this morning - though I'm jamming out to The Fugees on my headphones to drown out the noise around me. Easier to concentrate that way. What's your favorite music to listen to at work? It's usually something hard for me. Any electronica gets me going - especially when I'm working on computers. BT is great, as is Prodigy. As long as it's more hard than trance-y, I'll work like a speedfreak.

Wine on Sunday

Monday, November 17th, 2003

I have taken up a personal crusade. It is something that has irritated me and even infuriated me since I first learned of its existence. I plan to write and rally and bitch and yell until the law that bans the sell of alcohol in East Baton Rouge Parish on Sundays is lifted!!

I refuse to accept a Christian ideal or preference being shoved down my throat by the government. The government should not be allowed to be religiously prejudiced. In fact, for all the ignorant outcries that we're taking "God out of America", I have this to quote, from our first president:
"The government of the United States is not, in any sense, founded on Christian religion."
- George Washington, Treaty of Tripoli in 1796

I might could even accept this slight aggravation on Sundays if it were not for the fact that this law is ridiculous - even, obviously, to those that uphold it. You see, you cannot buy liquor on Sundays - but you can buy BEER after 12:00 noon!! If this was such a huge religiously inspired regulation, okay. But the fact that they allow you to buy BEER simply because they were losing too much money banning all alcohol is a slap in the face. If the law can be bent, it can be abolished.

I happen to love a bottle of Chardonnay on a Sunday afternoon. It's one of my favorite treats. I can't tell you the times I've tried to purchase one - only to be reminded that I cannot purchase alcohol on Sunday. I used to do my grocery shopping on Sundays - and would stock up on all needed liquors for the coming weeks. Beer and much wine - but the wine always had to be put back.

Perhaps I am a Wiccan, needing a bottle of wine for an impromptu ceremony. I'm going to have to drive to another parish to get it.

This law is wrong. It's religiously discriminatory. It is shoving another's beliefs and ideals down the peoples' throats. It has no business being on the law books!! And this little hippie-heathen is going to do everything she can to get it off!

Lowe’s Shopping

Thursday, November 13th, 2003

I spent my entire evening at Lowe's. Our super-cool landlord got us a 10%-off-anything discount card and we were able to put it to the washer & dryer we bought last week. He had no reason to do so; he's just that nice. What a change from the slumlord of my previous place - who refused to pay me back for the cement Templar cross his maintenance guys slapped paint all over in my patio.

While I was waiting for Baret to pick out light fixtures and switch panels and other boring stuff, I noticed a clearance tag on a set of patio lights. "CLEARANCE - $34.94" it read, and under that in small print, "Regularly $34.98". Wow, now there's a deal, eh?

I was pondering this morning on the stupidity of humanity. Yes, that's a lot to ponder as there is quite the abundance of it going around. A co-worker this morning asked me how I liked the intersection change at a rather large intersection near where I used to live. I informed him that I had moved, and didn't know about the changes.

"They took out the green arrows," he told me.

I really could only blink and go, "But why?"

This is a very busy 4-lane road that crosses over an extremely busy 4-lane highway. I couldn't fathom why they would eliminate the arrows when putting up the new lights. Did they think they weren't needed? Had they never driven in that part of town before? The co-worker informed me that in the three weeks since the change, there had been an accident every week (he lives just down from the intersection). I can't even imagine trying to turn and cross that highway with no arrows! What in the hell were these engineers thinking? You know, 'cause the thing we need most in Baton Rouge is more accidents causing worse traffic.

In other news, I created this yesterday; just in case you were bored enough to read a list of 100 things about me. I was also toying around with a little side project, Life Apart - because I'm a hopless romantic and I love love letters. Let me know what you think.

Damnit - got called away to fix a computer for 2 hours right in the middle of this, and can't remember what else I wanted to post. 'Til then...