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Archive for February, 2006

Johari Me like a Dirty Whore

Monday, February 27th, 2006

This Johari thing I nabbed from Rose is really cool - so, please, DO ME, DO ME, DO ME!!

Paris Hilton as Mother Theresa?!

Thursday, February 23rd, 2006

Calling all who know that SOME things should never be:

Paris Hilton has been asked to star in a movie.

That's nothing.

It's a movie about the life of Mother Theresa, and Paris has been asked to play THE Mother Theresa.

No, I'm not joking. I'm SO not joking, and so upset that this might transpire, I have called my legion of gnomes to help me stop this from happening:

Please go - read - and SIGN. Link and pass it on. We cannot let this happen.

Paris No Mother Theresa which explains the reason for No To Paris Hilton As Mother Theresa.

I, and the Universe, thank you.

i am looking young ,smart & cheerful

Monday, February 20th, 2006

Guys, if you find that most girls online give you the cold shoulder when you try to chat them up understand that it's because 99% of the men that contact them are like this:

vishal_gets: hi
vamp_lynx: hi
vishal_gets: hi
vishal_gets: how r u ?

vamp_lynx: Ok.
vishal_gets: i am vishal
vishal_gets: 22m
vishal_gets: and u

vamp_lynx: All that info is on my profile. Didn't you look at it before you IM'ed me?
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: what do u do ?

vamp_lynx: i work with computers.
vishal_gets: i am also
vishal_gets: i am computer eng & now i am network admin

vamp_lynx: Ok.
vishal_gets: u r looking so beuatiful
vishal_gets: after see ur profile

vamp_lynx: Ok, thanks.
vishal_gets: u r 28
vamp_lynx: Yes.
vamp_lynx: Brb
vishal_gets: hello
vishal_gets: are u busy ?

vamp_lynx: Don't you know what "brb" means?
vishal_gets: ya
vishal_gets: be right back

vamp_lynx: Well....why were you buzzing me?
vishal_gets: nothing

vamp_lynx: Nothing?
vishal_gets: i think u r busy so i buzzing u
vamp_lynx: I told you "brb"
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: i told u "valy"

vamp_lynx: No you didn't.
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: as u wish
vishal_gets: tell me about ur office time

vamp_lynx: What?
vishal_gets: i means whats office-time scedule ?
vamp_lynx: I work 8 hours a day, if that's what you are asking.
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: valeria, are u in office ?

vamp_lynx: Not right now.
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: valeria tell me something
vishal_gets: i am confuse

vamp_lynx: What?
vishal_gets: valeria, are u married ?
vamp_lynx: No.
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: i am also
vishal_gets: nice to chat with u

vamp_lynx: Ok.
vishal_gets: have u any bf ?
vamp_lynx: Yes.
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: but haven't any gf

vamp_lynx: Ok.
vishal_gets: do u want to make my gf ?
vamp_lynx: "Make my gf"? What does that mean?
vishal_gets: i mean do u want be my gf ?
vamp_lynx: Are you serious?
vishal_gets: i am realy serious
vishal_gets: because i need girl who understand me & i am undestand her
vishal_gets: all that thing u have

vamp_lynx: "All that things u have". You don't know me. Do you regularly ask complete strangers, who are already in a relationship, do be your girlfriend??
vishal_gets: i tell u truth
vamp_lynx: What truth? That you're weird?
vishal_gets: no
vishal_gets: i am not

vamp_lynx: You are asking a complete stranger to be your girlfriend - one that you've talked to all of 5 minutes. Yes, that is weird.
vishal_gets: i am sure that i havent any gf
vamp_lynx: So?
vamp_lynx: Go find one - don't pick up strangers online, weirdo.
vishal_gets: because if u think
vishal_gets: i am not that type of person who cheat other

vamp_lynx: I think that I have a boyfriend and I don't KNOW you.
vamp_lynx: I don't cheat either - but you're asking me to!
vishal_gets: ok
vishal_gets: just forget about it & lets chat

vamp_lynx: What is wrong with you?
vishal_gets: u know i havent any luck
vamp_lynx: It has nothing to do with luck. Maybe you try hitting on people you know, from your own country, who aren't attached. Just a thought.
vishal_gets: i never get love in my life
vamp_lynx: Perhaps because you're going about it in the wrong way.
vishal_gets: so tell me that whay
vishal_gets: what am i doing ?

vamp_lynx: Here's a few tips: 1) Meet a real person and get to know them first, 2) Be in the same country, it helps and 3) Don't ask people that already are in a relationship. This should be pretty obvious.
vishal_gets: thanks
vamp_lynx: I mean, you didn't think of any of that???
vishal_gets: u r my best friend
vamp_lynx: Um, no I'm not.
vishal_gets: but whats proble have u
vamp_lynx: That doesn't make any sense.
vishal_gets: plz
vishal_gets: only u which solve my problem

vamp_lynx: What??
vamp_lynx: Your English is getting steadily worse.
vishal_gets: ya
vishal_gets: but try my best

vamp_lynx: I see.
vishal_gets: valeria tell me that what am i doing to get girl ?
vamp_lynx: I don't know - try not doing it online with people from other countries.
vishal_gets: i never try in online
vamp_lynx: You just did
vishal_gets: but i only know that i love u
vishal_gets: if u belive or not
vishal_gets: in our india nobody cheat their gf as compare to ur country

vamp_lynx: You DO NOT love me, crazy man!
vamp_lynx: You're asking ME to cheat on MY boyfriend, stupid!
vishal_gets: i love u because i like foreginer
vishal_gets: i like ur face
vishal_gets: but why ?
vishal_gets: i am looking young ,smart & cheerful

vamp_lynx: I have a boyfriend. I don't know you.
vamp_lynx: I don't like you.
vamp_lynx: I sure as hell don't love you.
vamp_lynx: We've been talking all of five minutes.
vishal_gets: plz dont break my hert
vamp_lynx: I'm not.
vishal_gets: ok
vamp_lynx: You are breaking your own heart with your weird thoughts of "love".
vishal_gets: ok foerget about it
vamp_lynx: Not a problem.
vishal_gets: do u intrest in ssex ?
vamp_lynx: What?
vishal_gets: i means, have u ever enjoy sex in ur life ?
vamp_lynx: That's none of your business.
vamp_lynx: I'm leaving for work now. Goodbye.
vishal_gets: noooooooooooo
vamp_lynx: Yeah, I have to work.
vishal_gets: hello
vamp_lynx: No, goodbye.
vishal_gets: plz
vamp_lynx: Bye
vishal_gets: i never asking again
vishal_gets: i am not that type person
vishal_gets: plz
vishal_gets: dont go

vamp_lynx: I HAVE TO GO TO WORK
vishal_gets: tell me that when to me again
vishal_gets: plz

Hotline Hilarity – The Westbank Shopper Gets Its Own Page

Friday, February 17th, 2006

You all remember "Hotline" from the small paper. Well, it's garnered its OWN PAGE on my site. Check it:

Hotline Hilarity

You guys have read all the others here on my blog, but the * ones are all *new*! Enjoy!

Cold Cocktail

Tuesday, February 14th, 2006

Shanna's morning cocktail, to combat this damn cold/upper resp. infection she's got:

1 Mucus Relief DM (for the nastiness I'm coughing up)
2 Extra-Strength Tylenol (for the fever and subsequent achy body)
1 Amoxicillin (for the infection)
2 Wal-Phed (generic for Sudafed, for the sinuses)
and a partridge in a pear tree.

Since I'm all hopped up on meds, I'm pretty incapable of writing anything worthwhile. I'm going shuffle back to bed now. Be well.

Productive Coughs Are Happy Coughs

Sunday, February 12th, 2006

I'm sick.

I just downed some Wal-Tussin (generic for the Robitussin), which is supposed to - as the bottle reads - make my coughs more "productive".

That's what I need right now, too - more productive coughs to get this nasty congestion out of my throat.

I don't seem to have fever today, as I did yesterday, but I'm still not feeling my best.

Anyway, just thought you should know that if you need your coughing to be more productive, get some Wal-Tussin. That is all.

Super Bowl Commericial Review (Sort Of)

Friday, February 10th, 2006

So I'm late on this, but if I was on time with it, well, it wouldn't be me.

And I gotta be me. (Little Friday cheese for ya.)

Anyway, let's talk about Super Bowl commercials. You know you love 'em. They had some pretty good ones this year - but two really stood out.

First, the Budweiser: Clydesdale American Dream; I cried like a damn baby. It was so touching and sweet. Animals - gets me everytime. In case you missed it, grab a tissue:

Budweiser: Clydesdale American Dream Superbowl Commercial

Next. fucking Westin - first smoke-free national hotel chain. Big whoop. Yes, kiss my ass - I'm glad you're so proud of yourself, Westin-folks. Really. But me? I'm not impressed, you pompous asses.

You guys stockpiling those cartons of cigs like I told you to? If not, you'd better start - it will be completely illegal to smoke in five to ten years.