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Archive for August, 2006

My Dirty Bitch

Wednesday, August 30th, 2006

Stella, that's my bitch.  Longtime readers will know her as my 1997, dark blue (almost black), Mazda Miata that I am very much in love with.  Stella has been down and out for over a month now, but started (apparently and so far) working properly again when we attempted to drive her to the auto shop yesterday.

So I'm using her to go back and forth to work this week, to see if she starts acting up again.  What sucks, though, is that Stella has been sitting, unused, under the carport for over a month - and is covered in a fine layer of dust, sprinkled with perfect little paw prints.  She is absolutely filthy; so dirty that I was embarassed to drive her to work this morning.

I didn't want to wash her yesterday, though, in case she started acting up and had to be brought to the shop - where she'd get all grimey and dirty and need another washing anyway.  But if she does fine today (no problems on the in-to-work trip), she's getting a washing tonight (of course, that's probably when she'll decide to stop working again, eh?)

The Anniversary of Katrina

Tuesday, August 29th, 2006

In honor and remembrance of the horror that was Hurricane Katrina, and the devastation it brought to the Gulf and the City of New Orleans, I urge you to read this excellent look-back article, Remembering Katrina, at New Orleans' own The Times-Picayune newspaper.

Granny’s Last Request? Get Naked

Saturday, August 26th, 2006

And I thought the drive-through funeral homes here in the U.S. were crazy:

China cracks down on striptease funerals

Thu Aug 24, 10:13 AM ET

China may be giving striptease funerals the last rites after officials arrested five people and ordered an end to the practise, state media said.

Strip shows have been commonly used to attract more mourners to funerals, as villagers believe a crowded send-off brings more honor to the deceased, Xinhua news agency said.

But police took action after state television exposed the "obscene performances" at a funeral in Donghai county, Jiangsu province, with 200 people including children in attendance, it said.

"When the performance reached a climax, two performers started stripping and to show their charm. They even dragged audiences onto the stage to join them," Beijing News said, citing the television report.

Wealthier families in villages often employ two troupes of performers to try to draw a crowd at the funerals of their loved ones.

After the television report, the local government quickly issued an order to stop the practice and demanded that village committees have to report details of each funeral plan within 12 hours after a villager dies.

A hotline was also set up for residents to report on "funeral misdeeds," it said. The funeral striptease is also a popular custom in parts of Taiwan.

From Yahoo! News

So it really doesn't matter what type of people are at your funeral, or if they even knew you at all - just so long as there are a lot of people in attendance.

Really - I keep trying to think of something pithy to say, but I'm at a loss for words.

Why Me?

Friday, August 25th, 2006

It's been awhile since I've had any asshat run-ins - mainly because I was sick from work for two full weeks this month and had no reason to be on the road. Yet I knew such bliss, in a city full of terrible drivers, had to come to an end sooner or later.

Today it did. I've been trying - honestly - to be less aggressive on the road. True, my aggressiveness was born of super hyped defenses in manuevering the roads of the city I live in and an ever-growing abhorrence for 90% of the drivers around me, but, I have to admit, that's no excuse. Yes, I became aggressive out of necessity and sheer outrage at the terrible driving I witnessed on a daily basis and I'm still a better driver than most - but I needed to calm down a bit; stop trying to drive my Miata like it was a Hummer, in other words.

And so I have. I only listen to calm, slower music (no more KoRn, Prodigy, etc. - which sucks) in the car and I try to just "go with the flow". Still, there are assholes on the road, even if you're being level-headed and courteous. One nearly clipped me today.

The guy decided, apparently, that the person in front of him in the left lane was going too slow for his taste, so he thought he could speed up and jump over in my lane to get around him. Problem was, I was speeding up because the person in front of me had just turned off on a side street. So Jackass, just starts coming over and I realize his back end is about to seriously clip my front end. I slam on my brakes, laying on the horn, hoping he'll move back in his lane in case I'm not able to stop short enough. He doesn't (horns mean nothing to drivers around here, remember?) and, thankfully, he doesn't clip me (I'm good with my brakes) and the person behind me doesn't slam into me from my stopping so short.

Then - wait for it - wait for it - (you already know, don't you?) - just wait....yes, the fucktard flipped me off. You know, for blowing my horn at him - because he was about to hit me! He continued doing this zipping in and out of cars, not caring if he was cutting people off, on the two-lane, 45 mph highway, and was soon out of sight.

Lovely way to start off a Friday, now isn't it?

Bring Back Pluto!

Thursday, August 24th, 2006

I have to say, I'm pretty upset about the decision to cull Pluto from the list of "official" planets.

Astrologically speaking, what's this mean for all us Scorpios? They just freaking nixed our ruling planet! Are we back to sharing Mars with the Aries rams? Will astrology still, for its own purposes, consider Pluto one of the nine? Will Scorpios everywhere stand quietly by while scientists claim we are ruled by a "dwarf planet" (which just simply means, you know, not a real planet)?!

That's it, I'm off to start my Bring Back Pluto campaign right now.

Weasel War Dance

Wednesday, August 23rd, 2006

On the job front, I've decided to be a responsible adult (gag me with a spoon, I know) and not quit this job until I definitely have another lined up. It's not the way I'd like to do things but I have responsibilities now - to The Worm, to our pets; we've gotten used to a certain lifestyle and, while not posh by any means, we're very comfortable with it. That lifestyle can only be maintained by both of us working full-time. I can't take a chance and just "hope" that I find new employment in the next few weeks - especially with the crappy job market around here. It could take months - and in the interim, we'd stand a chance of losing a lot of what we've worked so hard to achieve (including a really, kickass townhome that we rent and love). So...yeah. That's that - I'll keep you posted.

In other news, my life-long pining for a ferret has grown to a fever pitch in the last week. This is due to the joy of being directly exposed to four little weasely balls of fun and fur the past few days. Our neighbor, a true animal lover, asked (after I'd offered a few weeks ago) if I would pop in twice a day and feed his animals while he was out of town on business. He owns two great dogs, four fun ferrets and a very charismatic cockatiel. I gladly took him up on the offer.

The past few evenings have found me playing with the animals, and I spend a good hour or more there when I can. I take the ferrets out of their cage and let them play, often playing with them (or just watching them - they're great). I've wanted a ferret for as long as I can remember (actually, it's since I first saw The Beastmaster as a child), but I've never actually gotten to spend any quality time around them - holding them, watching them and playing with them. Now that I have, I'm as hooked as I always knew I would be.

So now I'm reading up all I can on ferrets and owning ferrets and thinking about what kind of changes we'd have to make in our household to have (or two).  What would JoJo and Gia think?  My neighbor has eight cats at his home in Texas (he's here temporarily for work) and he says they all get along fine with the ferrets - some play with them and some just ignore their presence.  What do we need to do to ferret-proof the home?  Would I be able to keep them out (uncaged) for most of the time (at least when we're home)?

I have to admit that one thing that bothers me is their lifespan.  They seem to live about six years - and that might seem like a long time, but it goes quickly; believe me.  Our two short years with Gillian seemed to be over in the blink of an eye, and my heart still hasn't fully recovered.  Though ferrets can live up to ten years, most do not.  It's a silly reason not get a pet, I suppose - I've lost so many wonderful pets (cats, dogs, birds, hamsters, etc.) over the years that I'm no newcomer to pet loss and it's terrible pain.  I'm honestly more worried about The Worm - who never had cats until he started dating me, and who took Gilly's death so hard that he continually refuses us getting any more pets (cats or ferrets).  I'm working on him, though.  You can't lose out on the joys of pet ownership and companionship simply to avoid the pain of loss; maybe one of these days he'll come around.

As for me, I'm soaking up ferret knowledge like a sponge, and probably won't stop hounding him for one (or two) until he gives up in utter disgust. ;)  He'll thank me for it later.  I've wanted one for so long, and now that I've had a chance to see how amazing they are, my want has only intensified.  So hopefully - in the next year or so - I'll be adding one or two ferrets to our little brood.  And of course I'll share pictures!

A Good Reason Not to Use Yahoo! Answers

Saturday, August 5th, 2006

Strolling through Yahoo! Answers the other day, I came across this gem:

The question:

what is a less pain ful way to get rid of a boil rather than sitting in a hot tub?

The honest answer:

if u want it to go away very quickly u have to take the painful way. burn the boil'd "eye" with a cigarette. i tell u it will swell but in just a matter of days its all gone.