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January 19th, 2005

The Westbank Shopper Returns

People of Iberville Parish, for the love of all things holy and sacred, please, stop drinking the water!!!

I am convinced that the majority of Ibervillians are either insane or are completely lacking the sense god gave a goose; or a snail, for that matter.

To prove my point let me regale you with another "Hotline" letter from the now infamous Westbank Shopper:

Remember Them...

I'd like to remind everyone that we've lost 25 Louisiana soldiers. While you people are sitting at home watching garbage like "Desperate Housewives", take a moment to think about them. Everything people say about Democrats is true - they are liberal and their Communist. Case in point: our esteemed governor, "Queen Bee" herself, is going to make a trip to Cuba to promote Louisiana goods and services. We don't need no trade with no Communist country. We don't need their Godless money. We can sell our stuff to the Mexicans. We need to impeach the goveernor because she is a closet Communist who wil probably fall for that Cuban lothario Castro and end up becoming the queen of Cuba.

People from Iberville parish, mainly Plaquemine, are a strange lot. They bitch about not having enough jobs, but go up in arms when things like airports or new plants offer to come into the area for fear of it encroaching on hunting land and bringing uncouth persons to the area. They believe people should be able to shoot whatever they want on whomever's property, and there is not a week that goes by that they don't complain about the barking dogs in some neighbor's yard (I'm imagining this is the "animals" they'd like to shoot "on other's land"). They think that Liberals and firecracker stands are the devil and anyone who isn't Christian should be hunted down during deer season. Now, apparently, they also believe that our governor is not only a Communist, but the soon-to-be Queen of Cuba. Amazing. I'm amazed - aren't you amazed?

My sister says, when she sends me this stuff, "be merciless" - but do I really have to? With such blaring stupidity what more can I say? These people mock themselves just by opening their mouths.

Don't tax us again...

A couple of weeks ago I read a column in the Post/South talking about cuts to the Veterans Adminisration. Well, the writer of this column is probably using this as an excuse to speak out against the war. These people are fighting to protect our freedom, and they're volunteering to do it. Nobody told them to. I appreciate what they're doing, but it's not like we have a draft anymore. If people listen to folks like Mr. Dupont saying we should raise taxes to give more money to the Veterans Administration, then the same people are going to be saying we need to raise taxes for something else. I think the writer of that column is just another 'tax and spend' liberal who wants to punish the wealthy. The government needs to treat the Veterans Administration the same way as a business - run it efficiently, and then there won't be the cries for more money.

Heaven forbid the wealthy use their money to help others - much less others that fought and died so that you could spend that money as you so chose. I fail to see how being liberal has anything to do with the belief that we should support our vets.

First off, Miss Know It All, did you know that most of the Louisiana boys we've lost to the war were National Guard? Don't tell me they volunteered with the idea that they may be sent off to war someday. No, we don't have a draft "anymore" but a lot of the vets you're claiming we shouldn't help were drafted - my grandfather, for one. They didn't choose to get sent to war - but they went, they fought, some were wounded and some never came home. If we don't take care of our vets, above everyone and everything else other than our children, then what kind of a country are we? If it weren't for them we wouldn't have the freedoms we take for granted; such as the one that allows you to stand up and bash the true heroes of our country. You appreciate what they do, do you? Has anyone in your family ever gone to war? Do you know anyone personally that is fighting in this war now? My guess is no, otherwise you might not be so quick to throw out such ignorant judgements.

Aren't you jealous, dear readers, that you don't live in such an interesting state? And won't you be all the more jealous when we join forces with Cuba and are more powerful than any of you? From there we'll spread out like a disease, starting firecracker stands in the other 49 states, destroying airports and factories and spreading the hunting land, we'll lock all non-Christians in closets and free the priests from the camps. Soon we will wipe out all those that don't believe as we do - all of the Satanic, firecracker popping, Communist Liberals who don't own guns. Be afraid - be very afraid.

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