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May 31st, 2006

More Hotline Hilarity

Often I will feature complaints called or mailed into Hotline; a farcical Op-Ed featured in a small, local and free paper distributed to the denizens of Iberville Parish here in Louisiana.

The complaints range from outrageously ludicrous to frighteningly pathetic. If you'd like to check out some of the old ones, you can view the Westbank Shopper category, or the page I've put together on my website to display them, Hotline Hilarity.

Adding to previous Southern-ignorance, I'd like to share with you Ban Them and Protect Us!

Ban Them and Protect Us!

I want to complain about a couple stores here in Plaquemine selling a DVD of a certain movie called "Brokeback Mountain" that played in theaters last Christmas. I think they need to do something to ban that DVD from being sold here. What's to say the children won't get hold of it. And it's not like adults need to witness that kind of immoral garbage either. I know some of you complain that it's a violation of your right to choose, but sometimes your choice is not morally correct. That's why it's important that someone make the decision to stop you from taking that route. So I say ban the DVD - and any other immoral trash - from being sold or rented out in this parish. I know what's morally right, and it's my mission to purify all of you.

Wow! Don't you feel better? Don't you feel safe knowing there are people out there like this trying to "purify" you and disallow you from making "morally" incorrect choices in life? Aren't you blessed to have someone that considers it their personal "mission" to keep you on the "morally correct" path - a path that you, you heathen, can not help but stray from? Only people this determined, pure and free of sin know what's right and what's best for you. Isn't it great that they believe forcing their beliefs and moral code on others is imperative? I, for one, know I can sleep better at night now!

What's truly terrifying, in all seriousness, is that there are people that do believe this way. Perhaps even more disturbing is that there are legions of people that believe this way; some of them happen to be running our country.

In closing, let's remember that "Brokeback Mountain" was, essentially, a movie about love. I see absolutely nothing immoral about that.

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One Response to “More Hotline Hilarity”

  1. Ducky
    Ducky says:

    Anytime someone wants to ban something that they don't agree with, I cordially invite them to visit Saudi Arabia. Same goes for people who insist on theocratic government.

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