Log inskip to content

July 17th, 2006

Yard Signs & German Shepherds Irritate Ibervillians

Time for some more laughs from everyone's favorite wacky Ibervillians and their great call-ins to Hotline:

Actions Not Unnoticed!

This is to the person who let their dog jump out the back of their truck at Wal-Mart and let it relieve himself on the tires of my SUV. I will hunt you down both you and your dog, and you'll both face charges of terrorizing my American made vehicle with your German shepherd. You're actions did not go unnoticed!

I'd like to know who's going around Iberville parish and teaching all of these cats and dogs to piss on unsuspecting peoples' tires. Obviously, this is a fairly common problem 'round these parts. I mean, when your tires aren't safe from urine even in a public parking lot...what is the world coming to?

One might be inclined to believe, if they did not know the area, that some of these must be meant in jest - that these call-ins are merely pranks and not to be taken seriously. I can assure you, however, that these people are more likely than not dead serious.

Pull the Signs!

I think we ought to pass an ordinance banning all yard signs, even those that urge we support our troops.  How much effect does a yard sign have on the war to begin with?  What all these yard signs are doing is cluttering up our streets, and hampering the natural beautification of our city.  When I see these signs along the streets, I remove them if nobody is watching, and I do it in the name of beautification.  But I can't do this forever, so I ask the Parish Council to do its part in banning yard signs so we can have a beautiful community again.  One day, you'll all thank me for this.

I wonder how "I did it in the name of beautification" will stand up in court when this yahoo is picked up for trepassing and stealing?

Don't you just have this mental image of some crotchety, old woman going around town in an old Buick, stopping and nabbing signs from peoples' yards?  You can just see her looking furtively around as she dashes back to her car and chunks said sign on the huge pile of stolen yard signs in the back seat?

Later, a sting operation is held to catch the person who wrote in to Hotline and outted herself as the Sign Snachter.  Yard signs are put in yards around town as decoys, and each is watched carefully by cops day and night.  Soon, she is caught!
As the now busted, granny Sign Snatcher is led away in cuffs, she yells out at the top of her lungs, "For beauty!!!"

At least, that's how I see it.

No tags for this post.

Leave a Reply

Gravatars are enabled. Don't have one? Go grab one!

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>

Spam Protection by WP-SpamFree



Calendar

July 2018
M T W T F S S
« Jul    
 1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
3031